Saturday, May 18, 2013

Cheerios and Jeerios

How will people react the first time Kevin Garnett tells Jason Collins that Collins's boyfriend tastes like Honey Nut Cheerios? Will they be mad at Garnett for attacking a gay man via his sexuality? Will they be content that homosexuality is being treated the same way as heterosexuality at the highest levels of athletic competition? Will they migrate to other cereals?


Tuesday, May 14, 2013

Throwback

The stroke of genius Commander Hadfield demonstrates in this weirdly popular video is that he synergized Bowie's iconography and the space program: two things that fit together so well because they both fell apart so spectacularly in 1986.

Challenger explosion.jpg
This can be a "challenging" image for Millenials to identify

I say, "Pfft," loudly and derisively to the whole scene. Call me when it's galaxy hero Commander Shepard singing in space and not some hoser with the mustache of a retired fireman and the body of someone whose muscle mass evaporated in zero gravity. If I want shitty karaoke with the occasional cool image of Earth from space thrown in to retain a modicum of my attention then I'll bring my Planet Earth DVDs down to the local pub on Wednesdays.

Sunday, May 5, 2013

Unlimited Appetite

Visiting my Grandma's house is like going to a Super Bowl party that lasts all weekend; I constantly eat as much junk food as I can because it is a "special" occasion.