Wednesday, January 6, 2016

Toronto Dominion Over All

So the not-so-self-aware folks at TD Economics came up with a new labour market indicator and the headline they chose to introduce it with is, "ONE INDICATOR TO RULE THEM ALL." That's right. They went with a metaphor using Tolkien's evil ring that corrupts even the purest of hearts. In this analogy (of their choosing!), they are Sauron and the labour market indicator possesses a hidden malevolent power to enable their control over (Middle) Earth.

This is terrible branding on their part. Monolithic institutions operating in big towers and with wide-ranging influence should not be quoting imperious necromancers to introduce a new product they are intent on everyone adopting.


I call upon the Frodo of our time to destory this foul statistic and banish its evil designs from our realm.

But as long as one of the world's most powerful banks is being oblivious to their imposing stature and to literary allusions, they might as well go whole hog. I propose TD Collections Services should reference Shylock from The Merchant of Venice. Their new product should carry the headline, "The adjustable-rate mortgage payment which we demand is dearly bought; 'tis ours and we shall have it."

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