Sometimes it's just not your day

“How come there’s a Father’s Day but no Son’s Day?” –Self-absorbed boy

“How come there’s a Labour Day but no Capital Day?” –Self-absorbed industrialist

“How come there’s a Labour Day but no Casearean Section Day?” –Less-than-intelligent mother post-surgery

“How come there’s a Presidents’ Day but not a Vice-President’s Day?” –Joe Biden

"How come there's a Guy Fawkes Day but not a Girl Fox Day?" –Feminist Otherkin

“How come there’s a Martian Luther King Day but not a Terrestial Luther King Day?” –Hard-of-hearing man named Luther King who also believes aliens walk among us 

"How come we celebrate Christmas but not Michaelmas?" –Devotees of the Archangel Michael and dumb people named Michael who have brothers born on December 25th named Chris

“How come there’s a holiday on Good Friday but not on bad Friday?” –Anthropomorphized Friday the 13^th