Conspiracy Theory 1 - Bed Bugs

Guys, what if bed bugs are being spread by Big Mattress as a way to boost sales? Those bastards at Posturepedic are sneaking into condo towers and apartment buildings with bags full of the pests and dumping 'em in the laundry room, I just know it. I hear they leave cryogenically frozen bug larvae in the new mattresses they sell that are designed to unfreeze and go to work sucking on your skin as soon as the warranty expires.